Tuesday, 29 March 2011

10 Things Men Hate About Women's Wardrobe

1. Dunagrees: Dungarees, whether trousers, shorts or dresses, are a major no-no. Girls look at you and think 'She looks so cute!'. Boys think "Why is she dressed like a giant baby?

2. Shoulder Pads: Leaves most men cold. No one we asked was keen on shoulder pads on girls, except one man with a Joan Collins fetish who wishes to remain nameless.

3. Granny Chic: (See also geek chic, vintage lovers). Nothing says 'spinster' like a prim floral dress, Edwardian ankle-boots (with ankle socks - aaaargh!!!), and a purse  "All this look needs is some cats" said one disapproving man.

4. Clogs: Babes looks thoroughly chic to us in their Breton top and  clogs. "Oh no! clogs! the worst!!! So deeply unsexy..." said one withering male. That told us then.

5. Ankle Socks and Heels: A kooky, cool twist on evening wear we say. "Contrived and try-hard" said one, "It works on Rihanna, but then so does everything

6. Dr Martens Boot: (cc Engineering Workshop Boots) They appeal to our 16 year-old selves, but we know these are never going to be man pleasers "Don't even go there...

7. Leopard Prints: Timeless, glamorous and goes with everything? "Tacky" said one, "Hideous" said another, "Pat Butcher!" exclaimed a third. Sorry Girls...

8. JumpSuits: We're thinking Studio 54, CodedApparel cc@CodedApparel, Scopnat cc@Scopnat ... They're thinking "Only if you're a supermodel".

9. Boyfriends Jean: We love to roll them up and dress them up. They remind me of annoying girls at Uni showing off that they've got a boyfriend!

10. Harem Pants: They hide a multitude of sins, cool, exotic, and above all, comfortable? "Hammertime!", "She looks like she's c***ped herself!".

Monday, 28 March 2011

10 things women hate about male's wardrobe

1.Flip Flops:  If there's no beach within a 100 metre radius then men should never ever be seen in flip flops. Full stop. We wouldn't mind so much if there was a preparatory pedicure involved, but nothing turns a girl's stomach more than 'tramp foot'.

2. Low-Cut T-Shirts: A staple of the boyband wardrobe, low-cut T-shirts are the modern equivalent of the '70s medallion man style unbuttoned shirt favoured by peacocks, and poseurs. and quite frankly, we're not impressed. I can call a number of Nigerian Celeb commiting this crime.. Ednut Beware

3. Snazzy Jeans: They're stonewashed AND giving a man lady-bottom!

4. Vests; Every man who thinks they look good in a vest never actually does" reveals one anonymous vest-stabbing woman

5. Double/Dangling Ear-rings: Unless you are a rapper, one earring is pushing it. Two strikes and you're out.

6. Boots Over Jeans: Talking of pantomime pirate's.... Men should never, EVER, tuck their trousers into boots. You think you look like a cool, carefree male model. Reality check: you look more like Louie Spence

7. Short Shorts: Short shorts are unforgivable on any man, and yes Christiano Ronaldo and Rio Ferdinand, that means you too.

8. UGG Boots: Ah, the Ugg boot. When women slip their feet into a sheepskin-lined pair, it's an instant ticket to sloth-dom. When men succumb (how their partners let them is beyond us) it's so disconcerting we start to question the meaning of life.

9. Short-Sleeved Shirts: Short sleeve shirts are the preserve of the pub casual. Team one with a tie and it's game-over. Boys, if it's hot, roll-up your sleeves

10.Leather Trousers: The ultimate wrongness, "Leather trousers are to men's fashion what Ugg Boots and pyjama bottoms are to womenswear - a 24ct no no." Yes, even if you're Brad Pitt.